A run through loneliness

        Have you ever felt so alone that you felt sick? Every single day you thought about leaving everything behind and disappearing, starting again. Everyone seemed judgmental and every action you made seemed wrong. You felt left out, disregarded, maybe even hated.

        I have. Every day I forced myself to put on a smile and walk around like everything was okay and I was as happy as one could be. Every night I would lay in my sadness and cry myself to sleep. For three months this happened. Day after day I felt alone, like a body with no soul. A ghost almost. In this time, I learned what it truly meant to be alone. Much like Vladek felt when he lost Anja.

       
Everybody deals with loneliness differently. Anja chose the easy way out. Vladek, similar to myself, chose to fight it and power through. The outcome of the battle between loneliness and the soul is a changed human being. One that has suffered the greatest pain. Loneliness. "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty"- Mother Teresa.

        I found that the best way to fight loneliness is to immerse yourself into something you love and that you can control. Something that sparks a fire so bright, so hot, that all the pain is burned away. My igniter was running. Through running I found myself. My loneliness turned into solitude. What was once a depressing day that I would have spent in bed, was now a day where I tied the laces and outran the pain.
     
         Vladek's igniter was cleaning. Vladek's need for everything to be in order and spotless was his way of coping with loneliness. By being able to control something in his life, Vladek tied himself back down to Earth and cleaned up his soul.  Even a few cigarette ashes were a burden on his effort ti fight loneliness, which is why he gets so upset.

        I felt just like Vladek on days when I did not get to run. I felt like I was losing. I felt as though my efforts were in vain and I was going to return to the dark horror which was my past. Loneliness kills.

        There is no greater pain than being lonely so if you every feel sick, if you ever feel like leaving everything behind, if you ever feel judged, then fight back. There are seven billion people in the world. You are never alone. You have the greatest friend of all. Yourself. Be your own best-friend. Don't hurt yourself, find yourself. Never let loneliness take over, for loneliness is a poison in which one will never recover. And if you can't find yourself, I for one will always be here to help fight the loneliness for you.

A run through history and memory...

        Is history affected by memory, or are they two separate branches of the mind that don't meet? Run with me and let's find out.

        The basics of history and memory is that they both deal with the past, they are both unique to each individual, and-most importantly-they are two separate branches. As explained, both history and memory are based on the premise that it already happened. The red light you ran yesterday is both in the history of your lifeline and a memory in your brain. Now you may remember the fact that you were late for a meeting and you were rushing to get there on time, but the cop down the road remembers it as a violation of the law. Both parties remember it differently, they have different memories of it. However, the OBJECTIVE history states that you ran a red light and deserve to be ticketed. The key point here is that history is objective while memory is subjective. Now can your subjective view of history alter the true history? Sure it can. If you were to explain why you were ticketed for running a light, you probably would have included the fact that you were late for a meeting. Therefore, you have affected your history of the light-incident as result of your memory.

       Still not sure that my argument makes sense? Well maybe this picture will help.

        Here we have multiple runners, running on a clocks shaped as gears. Start with the red runner. His gear-clock is being turned by green runner. It is safe to say that red runner's history is affected by green runner, because green runner is causing red runner's clock to rotate. Move on to blue runner now. His gear-clock is rotated by red runner, which was originally rotated by green runner. Blue runner remembers it as red runner rotating his gear-clock but history states that it was green runner. 

Blue runners memory states that red runner rotated his clock. Blue runner's memory is changing his view of history based upon memory.

        To sum it up, history is concrete. It happened. Memories, however, are a hammer-jack in the sense that they break apart history. The Holocaust happened. However, Vladek's memory and Hitler's memory of the Holocaust-I can guarantee you-are extremely different. For Vladek, the Holocaust was nothing but death and despair...which it was. For Hitler on the other hand, the Holocaust was a new beginning, Hitler had memories of pride and rebirth from the Holocaust, until he killed himself of course. Hitler's pride and new beginning memory affected the history of the Holocaust for many Germans at the time. So yes, memories can affect history, and it can affect history greatly.

        Memory and history co-exist, much like a runner does with running. They hate each other. Yet, one could not survive without the other. One will always affect the other, whether they choose to or not.

     

A run through Feminism

        My class was once asked, "What words would you use to describe feminism?" The answers simply astounded me. Words such as crazy, insane, power-hungry, and feminine superiority is just a sample of what was yelled. At first I agreed with all this, but after learning the truth about feminism, it's safe to say I call myself one. It's about time you learn the truth too, my fellow reader.
     
       The dictionary definition of feminism is one that is deeply misunderstood. Before I attempt to change your view on feminism, I want you to completely erase any views or thoughts on feminism you have. Prepare your mind for change because feminism is a topic that, once understood, will change your life

       First off, let me re-establish a new definition. "Simply put, feminism is a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation, and oppression."(Bell Hooks,1). Feminism is NOT about women superiority. Those crazy lunatics you see running around New York without clothes on are not supporting feminism. To be honest, I don't know what they are supporting. Feminism is about creating equality in a world where there is a male patriarchy. Feminism is NOT about transferring the rights of men to women.

      The major problem with feminism is that the image of feminism is so polluted and that is a direct cause of the fact that nobody knows the true definition of feminism. If you think that the feminist image is not polluted, do me a favor before continuing to read this. Go to google and type in "feminists" and let your mind examine the search help that comes up. Now back to the point made above, "It became and remains a privileged discourse available to those among us who are highly literate, well educated, and usually materially privileged." (Bell Hooks,5) To spread the image of feminism we must become the Robin Hood's of the present, We must take these privileges to argue feminism from the rich and give them to everyone. Everyone includes the poor colored, the single women, the male with two kids who he is struggling to support. Everyone.

      Secondly, you can not in any way, create a bias based on the power-hungry, extremist females the media focuses on.  Compare the two images below.

 

      The one on the left is just absolutely insane. There is no other way to define it. Yet people let these insane thoughts run around in their minds and blur the definition shown on the right. Feminism is about creating a world where everyone is focused on equally. The original definition of feminism is still alive, all it needs now is a push in the right direction. "Let the movement begin again."(Bell Hooks,6)

      

To follow or to not follow the law?

        Everyday, we follow a set of rules that creates a guideline for our lives. These rules, known as laws, help to bring order to our great country. Or do they? Before you think that I am some kind of anarchist trying to reform the American system, I want you to really think about my previous question. Do YOU truly believe that laws help to bring order to America? I don't. I believe that some laws do nothing other than create a base for riots, and develop conflicts further. I believe that these same laws are nothing other than oppressive. I believe that the only way to change laws is to not conform to them.
     
        If a law is unfavorable and a majority of people don't think fondly of the law, why should we uphold said law? America was built on many ideas, two of them being that each human has their own amendments, and that the majority has an opinion on what happens to our nation. Now if a law were to violate an amendment, such as the first amendment, would it not make sense to break the law to defend what we built our nation on? The first amendment states that every human has the right and freedom to assemble without government interference. However, a lot of protests recently have ended in blood-shed and lost lives. A prime example of a peaceful protest gone wrong is the Oscar Grant protest. After Oscar was killed by a police officer, 500 people marched upon the station to protest his death. Tear gas was opened, people were hurt, and in the end 120 people were arrested. These men and women wanted nothing other than to protest the death of a fellow human and friend and in return they were attacked.
     
       Now, we all view police officers as upholders and enforcers of the law. So to assume that the police officers were acting by law when attacking the defenseless citizens makes sense! Yet, the law is what harmed these innocent people. The law is what sparked more riots to occur, because the law is what shut down these protesters' first amendment. This is a prime example as to why I believe that if you think a law is oppressive, and is acting against you, you have all rights to break it. If standing up for what you believe in means breaking the law, then so be it.

        As I stated previously, these laws are doing nothing but harming our fellow citizens. We are fighting ourselves in an effort to uphold rules. We are acting like a bunch of little kids. Instead of arguing over what's right or wrong, why don't we change so there is only right and no wrong. "I ask for, not at once no government, but at once a better government." (Thoreau). My view on how the government acts is very much formed by what Thoreau wrote. Everything he expressed seemed true to me, a little exaggerated, but none-the-less true. To create change we must stop fighting and act on the violence before it consumes our nation.